bookcover Crewsailors!
Crewsailors checked out but never left Africa!
1884 Berlin Conference
  Africa Orientale Italiana
  Ruth Margaret Mellis
  Penis Dismemberment
   Poor Berlusconi


November 13, 2011

Poor billionaire Silvio Berlusconi will be remembered for his Bunga-Bunga.  He was forced to resign because Italy borrowed more than it can repay.  Italy’s finances went Bunga-Bunga because Berlusconi went Bunga-Bunga.

Berlusconi lusted to outperform Julius Caesar in one thing.  Wowing women!

After much wine Berlusconi mistakenly slept with his own wife.  The nightmare that followed had Caesar yelling at him.

“What is this nonsense about Bunga-Bunga?”

“Nothing more violent than what you did in the coliseum!”

“I never had sex in the coliseum.  I was never exposed.”

“It’s that damned Google.”

“What will you do now?”

“Become a movie star.  Like Schwarzenegger.”

“Yes … but can you act?”

“Can he?”

“I mean can you perform?”

“Ask the girls.  It’s all over that damned Google.”

“You mean all that Bunga-Bunga was a performance?”

“Enhanced performance!”


“No.  Alcoholically.”

“What will you play?”

“A gigolo.”

“But you’re too old for that.”

“Then I’ll have to pay.”

“But that’s what you did for the last 17 years.”

“I sacrificed a lot for Italy.  It was my job as PRIMO MINISTRO.”

“You have demeaned Italian women more than Caligula.  He is now chief prosecutor in hell.  When you get here he will try you through the ICC.”

“The what?”

“The Italian Criminal Court.”

“For what?”

“Too much Bunga-Bunga.”

“It’s all because of that damned Google.  You and Caligula can go to hell.”

“We’re already here … waiting for you.  Including Gaddafi who feels you betrayed him by first kissing his hand then bombing him.  Gaddafi wants to kill you.”

It was the image of Gaddafi with a knife in his hand that scared the dream out of poor billionaire Silvio Berlusconi.

Send inquiries to KJA@crewsailors.com
Historical facts are welcome.
Satirical contributions are cherished